I had to be away from the social media today. This holiday is always such an awkward yet joyous day. Father's Day...the day we celebrate the men in our life who have raised us. Well...... I have a sweet and loving dad that has always felt too far away. I can't blame him. He became a father when he was in fact still a child. Our lives shifted in different directions and our paths just never really crossed back. The moments I have with him are awesome. Sweet wonderful memories filled with cotton candy, beaches, amusement parks, tender hugs, and the most amazing tickles. Unfortunately they always ended with goodbye and I then went back to the world of a drunken abusive yucko. So life goes. So it is hard for me to see people post pictures of their dad's because you see deep down I think I was always meant to be a daddy's girl and never got the chance.
However this is a joyous day too. I get to love and spoil this sexy man whom I get to spend everyday with. I have the privilege of watching him raise our children just like a dad I always wanted. I see his heart love on his children and see every choice being made for them. He has restored my faith in the everyday father.
This is also an anniversary for me too. 18 years ago today I went to my first church service with boyfriend now turned hubby. I still had the awkward experience of hearing the greatness of fathers and unfortunately at that time I had a lot of rage and sadness in me. Something amazing happened though. I for the first time felt my Father by me. The true Father who protected me from all the dark, the Dad who walked by my side every step of the way, the One who showed up for all celebrations, and comforted all heartaches.
It felt like he was sitting right beside me squeezing my hand tight. I vividly remember holding Phillip's hand with my right and holding Jesus's hand on the left. I find it no surprise that on Father's Day He would introduce the Spirit into my heart. The revelation that I was not alone all those years and that I could be a daddy's girl left a lump in my throat and filled a hole in my heart. I found a true Father on Father's Day.
I truly believe that how you envision your Holy Father goes hand in hand with how you view your own dad.
Anyone who has ever asked me knows my vision of Heaven. A grass field with tall flowing dandelions viewing the most spectacular ocean. I am sitting there taking it all in with my God. He has His arm around me and His left hand is holding mine. He has strong hands like my dad and tender hugs like him too. I bet He would tickle me if I asked but instead He is comforting me. Whispering I love yous and reminiscing over my life except through His eyes.
I am so happy for you dear friends who get to celebrate their great fathers, husbands, grandfathers, and all other men. You are lucky.
However this is a joyous day too. I get to love and spoil this sexy man whom I get to spend everyday with. I have the privilege of watching him raise our children just like a dad I always wanted. I see his heart love on his children and see every choice being made for them. He has restored my faith in the everyday father.
This is also an anniversary for me too. 18 years ago today I went to my first church service with boyfriend now turned hubby. I still had the awkward experience of hearing the greatness of fathers and unfortunately at that time I had a lot of rage and sadness in me. Something amazing happened though. I for the first time felt my Father by me. The true Father who protected me from all the dark, the Dad who walked by my side every step of the way, the One who showed up for all celebrations, and comforted all heartaches.
It felt like he was sitting right beside me squeezing my hand tight. I vividly remember holding Phillip's hand with my right and holding Jesus's hand on the left. I find it no surprise that on Father's Day He would introduce the Spirit into my heart. The revelation that I was not alone all those years and that I could be a daddy's girl left a lump in my throat and filled a hole in my heart. I found a true Father on Father's Day.
I truly believe that how you envision your Holy Father goes hand in hand with how you view your own dad.
Anyone who has ever asked me knows my vision of Heaven. A grass field with tall flowing dandelions viewing the most spectacular ocean. I am sitting there taking it all in with my God. He has His arm around me and His left hand is holding mine. He has strong hands like my dad and tender hugs like him too. I bet He would tickle me if I asked but instead He is comforting me. Whispering I love yous and reminiscing over my life except through His eyes.
I am so happy for you dear friends who get to celebrate their great fathers, husbands, grandfathers, and all other men. You are lucky.
I also grieve with the ones who have kissed or never had a dad.
I would like to send love to my dad who told me just a few months ago for the first time that he was proud of me and I could never disappoint him no matter what choices I have made. Thanks for reminding me why I see my Father the way I do. Always loving, always forgiving, and always proud.
I would like to send love to my dad who told me just a few months ago for the first time that he was proud of me and I could never disappoint him no matter what choices I have made. Thanks for reminding me why I see my Father the way I do. Always loving, always forgiving, and always proud.
With endless love,
Kristie
Kristie
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